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Our next interviewee is actually a friend of friend's. Truth be told, we've never met. But when I first started this blog, my friend told London Lizzie about my blog and she started reading it. A few months ago, she emailed me to tell me how much she loved the blog. It was still one of the most awesome things to have happened to me since I started this blog. Anyway, London Lizzie got married the same year as us (and had a photobooth, too!). I emailed her and asked her to share her ideas on marriage role models, since she and her husband are newlyweds, too (they *just* celebrated their 10 month anniversary! Yay!). I have to tell you, it's kind of weird to read somewhat intimate information about someone you don't know very well. But I also have to tell you, that's what's so cool about London Lizzie! She emailed me right back and was refreshingly honest with her responses. Enjoy!
1. Marty Created Alias? London Lizzie
2. What is your marital status? (If you are married, please tell me how long you've been married.)
Married for 10 months (today!).
3. Growing up, what was your view of marriage?
I don't think I thought a lot about it, it was just a natural progression thing, uni, career, marriage etc. I lost count of the times my mother said she didn't want me to have children out of wedlock (though she used different language to that) so it just seemed something I'd do before I had kids. It wasn't a great aim of mine - I wanted to be happy, rather than be married. Marriage has been a progression in our relationship, rather than an ambition.
4. Do you feel like you have strong role models for marriage in your life?
This is an odd one. My parents have been married for 39 years, both sets of grandparents stayed married and I had very few friends whose parents split up. Still, my parents never really talked about their marriage or relationship, or were positive about it so it felt as though they'd been born married, rather than chosen it, in a way. I can't ever remember seeing them be romantic, or be affectionate. In fact my mum once said she couldn't afford to leave my dad, so I never got the feeling they weren't really in love. They were married in church (by my mum's dad) and, although they don't go to church anymore, I think they still take their vows very seriously. Although their marriage has endured, which in itself is fantastic achievement and I greatly admire that, isn't the quality of the marriage something better to aspire to?
My mum has actually talked more about her marriage since I got married - as though I'm now part of the club and can share and understand confidences.
4a. If yes, how do you feel like they affect your marriage?
4b. If no, is/was this a concern for you? Do you wish you had better marriage role models?
I think my answer was a bit yes no! I suppose I didn't grow up with particularly negative feelings about marriage, nor positive ones.
5. Do you think having positive marriage role models is important to a successful marriage? Why or why not?
I think my dad would tell you that I do everything my own sweet way, so I don't think I look up to anyone. There's really not a lot we take from either of our parents' lives, or marriages - we have such different lifestyles, politics, incomes etc and I think the way we run our marriage is different, too. I like that we make our own rules about stuff. For me, communication is the greatest asset to a marriage and I don't think I, nor my husband, witnessed that in our parents' marriages. But, I do get a lot from the blogs I read, including yours, where I can read about people going through exactly the same things we are and know what it's not just us. (thank god!) So I suppose I see my peers as role models of sorts.
Our next interviewee is actually a friend of friend's. Truth be told, we've never met. But when I first started this blog, my friend told London Lizzie about my blog and she started reading it. A few months ago, she emailed me to tell me how much she loved the blog. It was still one of the most awesome things to have happened to me since I started this blog. Anyway, London Lizzie got married the same year as us (and had a photobooth, too!). I emailed her and asked her to share her ideas on marriage role models, since she and her husband are newlyweds, too (they *just* celebrated their 10 month anniversary! Yay!). I have to tell you, it's kind of weird to read somewhat intimate information about someone you don't know very well. But I also have to tell you, that's what's so cool about London Lizzie! She emailed me right back and was refreshingly honest with her responses. Enjoy!
1. Marty Created Alias? London Lizzie
2. What is your marital status? (If you are married, please tell me how long you've been married.)
Married for 10 months (today!).
3. Growing up, what was your view of marriage?
I don't think I thought a lot about it, it was just a natural progression thing, uni, career, marriage etc. I lost count of the times my mother said she didn't want me to have children out of wedlock (though she used different language to that) so it just seemed something I'd do before I had kids. It wasn't a great aim of mine - I wanted to be happy, rather than be married. Marriage has been a progression in our relationship, rather than an ambition.
4. Do you feel like you have strong role models for marriage in your life?
This is an odd one. My parents have been married for 39 years, both sets of grandparents stayed married and I had very few friends whose parents split up. Still, my parents never really talked about their marriage or relationship, or were positive about it so it felt as though they'd been born married, rather than chosen it, in a way. I can't ever remember seeing them be romantic, or be affectionate. In fact my mum once said she couldn't afford to leave my dad, so I never got the feeling they weren't really in love. They were married in church (by my mum's dad) and, although they don't go to church anymore, I think they still take their vows very seriously. Although their marriage has endured, which in itself is fantastic achievement and I greatly admire that, isn't the quality of the marriage something better to aspire to?
My mum has actually talked more about her marriage since I got married - as though I'm now part of the club and can share and understand confidences.
4a. If yes, how do you feel like they affect your marriage?
4b. If no, is/was this a concern for you? Do you wish you had better marriage role models?
I think my answer was a bit yes no! I suppose I didn't grow up with particularly negative feelings about marriage, nor positive ones.
5. Do you think having positive marriage role models is important to a successful marriage? Why or why not?
I think my dad would tell you that I do everything my own sweet way, so I don't think I look up to anyone. There's really not a lot we take from either of our parents' lives, or marriages - we have such different lifestyles, politics, incomes etc and I think the way we run our marriage is different, too. I like that we make our own rules about stuff. For me, communication is the greatest asset to a marriage and I don't think I, nor my husband, witnessed that in our parents' marriages. But, I do get a lot from the blogs I read, including yours, where I can read about people going through exactly the same things we are and know what it's not just us. (thank god!) So I suppose I see my peers as role models of sorts.
Thank you so much for agreeing to share with us!
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