Marriage Mondays: Making New Friends

vintage photo: great-grandma and friends

As I've gotten older, it's become harder and harder to make friends.  Finding people you get along with well enough to want to spend time with them gets more and more difficult when your time becomes more limited.  It seems like I am in fewer and fewer social situations where I can meet new people who would want to develop friendships.  Plus, if you're anything like A.P. and me, you don't necessarily want all your friends to come from the workplace since you need a break from those people.

Lately, though, A.P. and I have wished we had more friends in common or even couples to hang out with.  I have a lot of friends of my own, but A.P. only has a few.  Some of those few have moved away and he rarely hangs out with the ones still living locally.  And my friends that he really likes and would spend time with live out of state.  Which means that we basically have zero friends in common and zero couples to hang out with.

When you are in a relationship, you sometimes bring the dwindling number of friends on yourself.  To a certain extent, I know some of the friends we've lost over the years were our own faults.  We outgrew them, they moved away and we didn't stay in touch, etc.  But lately, we've been craving finding great people to hang out with that we both get along with.

When we went to Clandestino a few weeks ago, we met a great couple who were a lot like us.  This past weekend, we had a lovely dinner with them.  It was so refreshing to find people we both get along with.  I kept joking to A.P. that this was our second date with them and that we had to be on our best behavior.  No freak flag flying!  : )  Seriously, though, that event seemed like such a rarity.  Meeting this couple was great, but such a fluke!  We were so happy to meet and make new friends, but how in the world do you replicate that?

Have you had trouble making friends as you get older?  If you're in a couple, have you had trouble making couple friends?  How do you make and keep good friends as you get older?

(Photo by deflam via Flickr)

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  1. My husband and I are lucky that we went to law school together, so we have a lot of common law school friend couples. It's been really nice having that group of friends that we can do dinners, birthday parties, etc. with. And just a suggestion, but we recently met another couple at a cooking class. One of the places I take cooking classes at has a "date night for couples" and we met another couple there and hit it off. Maybe something like that would work for you guys?

  2. Have a kid and suddenly you meet all sorts of new people... What, not a good motivation? :)


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