5.07.2011

Marriage Mondays: The Sweet Life

This post is mega late. Seems like I'm behind on everything today. We had a busy/crazy weekend. We went to Spring Awakening Saturday night, which turned out to be a disappointment. I'm still kind of bummed about it. Still, I crossed it off of my list. Then yesterday, we went out to brunch with my brother, and when we we went to go home, we realized A.P. locked the keys in the car. That turned into a whole afternoon of headache because of course I didn't have my keys with me. Of course.

Anywho, it's time for Marriage Mondays again, and since I shared the tough things about being married last week, I thought it only fair to share the sweet things this week. Because if all we did was bitch about the crappy things, we wouldn't stay married, would we? So without further ado, I give you the the sweeter side of marriage.

1. Knowing someone like the back of your hand. Any good relationship has this, really, whether you're married or not. But the thing I've loved the most about being in a relationship with A.P. has been not wondering. Dating is filled with wondering, and being completely unsure of what the hell is going on. I hated that. Being with someone you trust and are honest with is so much better. No wondering what the hell is going on! I can just ask! It's fantastic. And marriage has added to that. Now you're stuck with me. Now I can really let loose. Though, we've been living together for three of our five years together, so I let loose long before marriage.

2. Having someone to take care of you when you're sick. It's totally underrated, but when you're a kid, it's the best thing ever. Marriage is similar to childhood in the sense that when I'm sick, someone else is up with me, comforting me. I sometimes get these terrible bouts of stomach cramps, and I'll be up all night. I usually try to get up quietly so that I don't wake A.P., but it seems like every time A.P. wakes up and gets me a glass of water. He asks me if I'm okay and waits for me to come back to bed. He gets me anything I need, and, well, it's awesome. I love knowing that he cares about me and wants to take care of me. And I try to do the same. It's nice to know you have someone to do that. It's not necessary, but it sure is nice.

3. Growing up and growing old. A.P. chose this one and I have to agree. We've changed so much in the last five years; it's amazing to see that change happen. Choosing to grow old with someone is pretty neat. It means you get to see them change not only physically, but grow from different experiences. It means that you've chosen to intertwine your story with that of someone else. Plus you get a PIC for life (partner in crime, for those of you not in the know).

4. Building your own family. I love my family so much, but as we've grown older, we've grown apart. We still stay in touch, but we are not as close as we used to be. It's nice to know that A.P. is my family now, and that I'll always have someone to spend holidays with. When I graduated from grad school a couple of years ago, it was a huge disappointment that my mother didn't come, but it made me feel so good to know that A.P. recognized what a big deal that was for me, and how hard I worked for it. He's my family and one day, we'll expand that family. And in some ways, it's like getting another shot at a family, and hopefully in the process, bringing my own family closer again.

5. Running a bath. I don't take showers. Ever. Unless I absolutely have to. I figure I stand a lot all day, so why torture myself some more? Plus getting hit in the face with water is not my idea of a good time. One of the things I love about A.P. is that after he takes his shower, he will often run me a bath. These days, he doesn't even ask, he just runs me a nice bubble bath. It's the sweetest, simplest thing, and I appreciate that he does it so much. And, yes, I take a bubble bath every night. Why wouldn't you live like this???

6. Putting up with your crap. The key to any successful relationship is that you have to be okay with each other's crap. I get angry easily. I flip out a lot. And over small things. A.P. knows I will do this, and even though he hates it, he puts up with it. A.P. doesn't do anything on time, ever. So, I put up with that crap. (One day, when I can get less angry about it, I will tell the story of our thank you cards.) The point is, in this great big world, the big secret that no one tells anyone is that it's not about looks, or compatibility, or having the same hobbies. Those are all fine and good, but in the end, it's really about putting up with each other's crap. And I'm grateful every day (even when I don't act like it) to be with someone who puts up with my crap, and whose crap I can deal with. Yay marriage!

I know I'm leaving a ton of stuff off this list, too. It's hard to pinpoint all the good/bad about marriage. It's easier to just to ebb and flow with things. That being said, what do you think are the sweet things about marriage or being in a committed relationship?

4 comments:

  1. Ah, putting up with my crap. Thank god my husband does that with what seems like patience. I couldn't deal with me!

    ReplyDelete
  2. haha, #6 is very interesting! It's probably also a big cause of divorce, a lot of people don't realise that marriage is also dealing with the other's crap.

    A nice thing I can think of is that you don't have to go through the little upsetting things of life alone. Sometimes a lot of silly little things go wrong at the same time: the dishwasher dies, the central heating won't work, it's raining in the attic or whatever... When you're single you have to deal with all that crap. As a couple, you can go prospect for a new diswasher while someone takes care of the roof, and the whole stuff feels less heavy.

    Oh, and kids! I don't get the people who want to have a child on their own (I don't judge them, but I just don't understand). For me a kid is so much work I can't imagine not having someone to take care of 50% of it!

    ReplyDelete
  3. number 6!! it's really a great feeling to watch someone put up with your crap fairly patiently. and know that they love you or why else would they do it? (i am not THAT good in bed!)

    #2 ok how many guys know how to take care of someone who is sick?

    ReplyDelete
  4. i am sorry. the word i had to input to get my comment up was spelatio. does that mean someone who
    nevermind i can't go there. why am i kinda dirty today?

    ReplyDelete

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...